Previously, on Internet Survivor...

Six weeks ago, ten not-complete-strangers from the far corners of the United States were invited to participate in a championship game of Internet Survivor.

Scott Von Doviak of Austin, TX was the first to reply:  “Am I first to reply? And if I'm the only one to ever reply, do I win a million dollars?”

He was soon joined by fellow Texan Rob McKim, East Coast Survivor virgin Erin Amar and West Coast Survivor addicts Eric Jacobstein, Andrea Presley, James Dryden and Lucifer Love.

Tim Sprague of Burbank, CA declined, explaining “My ability to keep up with Internet-related entertainments is piss-poor at best,” and thus became the first person voted out, followed by non-respondents Bebe Casey and bride-to-be Jennifer Hill.

Scott hit the ground running with victories in the first Reward and Immunity Challenges, giving the Internet tribe its name:  The Plug Uglies.

He also began scheming...

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR
Date: 1/15/03 11:28:25 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: James.Dryden@motortrend.com

Hey chief - I'm supposed to needle you into playing this. Andrew requires at least one more player. I offer you an alliance to the end. I swear on my children!
 

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: IMMUNITY CHALLENGE
Date: 1/19/03 5:32:35 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: Baitshop3, James.Dryden@motortrend.com, ejbeatnik@prodigy.net, rmckim@ccsi.com

Chieves, I think Pete has been sneaking out at night and eating our beans. I propose we whack him right away unless he wins immunity. He's too big a threat. We can easily take out Andrea and Erin afterwards. Who's with me?
 

Subj: INTERNET SURVIVOR: Plotting
Date: 1/19/03 5:36:27 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: Baitshop3, rmckim@ccsi.com

Rob - I've approached Jim for an alliance. I propose that we use him to get to the final three.  Then whichever one of us wins the final immunity can feel free to take Jim to the final two and probably assure a win. Eric can be our fourth, but of course, he's too likeable to allow into the final three, so we'll have to whack him before Jim. What do you think of my little scheme?
 

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: IMMUNITY CHALLENGE
Date: 1/20/03 8:50:14 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: rmckim@ccsi.com
To: ScottVonD@aol.com
CC: Baitshop3@aol.com, James.Dryden@motortrend.com, ejbeatnik@prodigy.net, rmckim@ccsi.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

Your scheme sounds good to me.
 

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: Plotting
Date: 1/20/03 8:54:31 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: rmckim@ccsi.com
To: ScottVonD@aol.com
CC: Baitshop3@aol.com, rmckim@ccsi.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

So far it sounds like a good idea.

**********************************************************
As the first round of voting began, Jim signed on to Scott’s plan, but not without reservations...

Subj: Survivor Strategizing
Date: 1/23/03 4:39:54 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: James.Dryden@motortrend.com
To: ScottVonD@aol.com, Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

Chief,
I went with your plan-but I think we shoulda voted off Eric or Rob first,
considering they may be iffy about getting involved on a regular basis with
this game.

****************************************************************
Meanwhile, Scott was voicing his own reservations...

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR:  TRIBAL COUNCIL
Date: 1/23/03 5:10:22 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: Baitshop3

In retrospect, trying to form an alliance with someone who never checks his email (Eric) was probably not my master stroke. I suppose I'll have to call him and badger him into voting.

**********************************************************
Soon, the first votes were cast, seeming to spell certain doom for the alliance’s first target:  Lucifer.

Subj: RE: INTERNET SURVIVOR: TRIBAL COUNCIL
Date: 1/23/03 11:38:02 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: James.Dryden@motortrend.com
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

The mosquitos bit my ass last night and a monkey peed on my bagpipes.
Everybody bugs me.

My vote goes to Pete, in keeping with prior commitments.

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: TRIBAL COUNCIL
Date: 1/23/03 2:07:08 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: rmckim@ccsi.com
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

I vote  for PETE to leave the island.  I'll miss his up-beat stories and
sunny nature. Pete's morning routine of naked jumping jacks may have put
some people off a bit.

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR:  TRIBAL COUNCIL
Date: 1/23/03 4:17:42 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: Baitshop3

[scrawls LOOSIFUR on parchment, holds it up to camera]

"Lucifer, my vote tonight is for you. It's nothing personal...but there's only room for one devious, conniving bastard on this island. You're a threat to me, so you have to go. No hard feelings, and I look forward to smoking your weed and watching your South Park videos when we get back to the mainland."

*********************************************************************************
Back in Boston, Erin – a potentially vital swing vote – remained blissfully unaligned:

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: TRIBAL COUNCIL
Date: 1/23/03 10:10:49 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: mzamar@toast.net
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

I'm voting Rob off because he didn't bother to respond to the challenge.

*******************************************************
With the first vote deadline approaching, anxiety swept the West Coast as the remaining Survivors finally woke up to the stakes involved.

Subj: whata we doin?
Date: 1/24/03 6:55:10 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ubertrout@hotmail.com
To: lucifer@luciferlove.com, straynge1@earthlink.net
CC: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

i have only a few short hours to vote someone off!!! they could be plotting
against me, but i am not worried...i just swallowed a couple more
valium...you want one...who are you voting off. i will go along with you my
dark lord.

Subj: Re: whata we doin?
Date: 1/24/03 8:17:58 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: straynge1@earthlink.net
To: ubertrout@hotmail.com
CC: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

Oy, I'm going with Eric -- he may not even check his email for another
week. Scott's obviously a threat, but he's immune, so whaddya gonna do?
I haven't been approached by anybody else, scheming-wise, so for all I
know we could be #1 & #2 on the majority bootlist. In this case, we'll
have to formulate our Jury strategy.

Subj:
Date: 1/24/03 8:54:35 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ubertrout@hotmail.com
To: Baitshop3@aol.com, straynge1@earthlink.net
Sent from the Internet (Details)

i don't think eric is a threat...he's not paying  attention...and we can
easily get him on our side. let's get in touch with him. and jim and start a
foursome.

Subj: Re:
Date: 1/24/03 9:03:02 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: straynge1@earthlink.net
To: ubertrout@hotmail.com
CC: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

I think we haven't heard from Jim for a reason. And the time for
strategy was a couple days ago...

Subj: Transcription
Date: 1/24/03 9:18:10 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: straynge1@earthlink.net
To: ubertrout@hotmail.com
CC: baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

This is to provide written record of our three-way telephone
conversation with Jim, which occurred about a minute before our
three-way with Eric. You remember -- you asked him what was up with
this game, and he replied with something like "uh, um, uh..." before we
hung up on his ass.

You had argued before that Jim isn't paying attention to this thing coz
he's always with his girlfriend. I countered that he probably sits and
schemes via email at work; just not with us. We now agree the latter
appears to be true.

Subj: Re: Confirmation
Date: 1/24/03 9:25:47 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: straynge1@earthlink.net
To: ejbeatnik@prodigy.net
CC: ubertrout@hotmail.com, baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

I've had no contact with anybody about this game until tonight, right
before the voting deadline. Assuming you're not a cunning double agent,
the Texans are probably counting on you to snooze through the vote and
miss it, like the Reward Challenge.

And I don't think Scott's worried about Jim's sorry ass. I believe
there's only one ass Scott's ultimately about saving.

*************************************************************************************
Realizing Jim had already turned against them, Andrea and Lucifer attempted to strike back, voting against him in a bloc with Eric.

Subj: Confirmation
Date: 1/24/03 9:05:27 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: straynge1@earthlink.net
To: ejbeatnik@prodigy.net, ubertrout@hotmail.com
CC: baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

This is to confirm our seconds-ago confusing telephone confirmation in
which we agreed to pool our ragtag asses for this vote, and all go
after Jim.

Subj:
Date: 1/24/03 9:03:16 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ubertrout@hotmail.com
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

jim (chief) need  i say more.

bye bye

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: TRIBAL COUNCIL
Date: 1/24/03 9:13:34 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ejbeatnik@prodigy.net
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

Eric votes for Jim, because he won't change his baggy pants.  Plus I said I would.

Eric to vote off JIM.

Subj: Re: Confirmation
Date: 1/24/03 9:15:06 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ejbeatnik@prodigy.net
To: ubertrout@hotmail.com, straynge1@earthlink.net
CC: baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

I just cast my vote for Jim.......Scott will be unhappy.

Subj: CONFIDENTIAL
Date: 1/24/03 9:43:53 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: straynge1@earthlink.net
To: baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

JIM

Because I'm thinking myself & 'trout are targets. We did manage to
cobble together a ragtag last-minute crew in hopes we're not up against
a bloc o' four, but if that's the case, there ain't much we can do
about it.

Tonight has reminded me that you shouldn't treat this game like an eBay
auction, where you wait 'til the very last second to place your vote.

Subj: Re: Confirmation
Date: 1/24/03 9:40:20 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: straynge1@earthlink.net
To: ejbeatnik@prodigy.net
CC: ubertrout@hotmail.com, baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

Well, the plans may all have to be re-thunk, depending upon who's alive
tomorrow...

You may very well end up sleeping with the enemy!

****************************************************************

Back in Austin, ringleader Scott began to worry about possible flaws in his plan after a phone call from co-conspirator Jim...

Subj: Stacking Up
Date: 1/24/03 9:11:41 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: maxedward@earthlink.net
To: ScottVonD@aol.com, Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

Chief,
I just got a panicked phone call from Andrea and Pete, asking me to join an
alliance. The call took me by surprise, because, as you can imagine, Andrea
just blurted things out before even saying hello, so my hesitancy must have
been a give away that I was already in collusion. They hung up before I had
a chance to speak.

Go figure, I guess the games are underway. I swear my loyalty to an alliance
with you. I have your e-mail swearing an alliance with me, so I will hold
you to that.
Chief

I woke up this morning with Eric rubbing against me. He said he thought I
was his wife.
 

Subj: Re: Stacking Up
Date: 1/24/03 9:31:19 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: maxedward@earthlink.net, Baitshop3

Ack. I figured those two would have already approached Erin to join them, as she would seem to be a free agent. Well, not much we can do at this point except see how the vote turns out. Hopefully Rob and Eric have done the right thing and Pete will go. If not, we'll have to do some quick thinking for the next round.

*******************************************************************************************
When the votes were revealed, the fears of both sides were confirmed...Lucifer and Jim were both on the chopping block, with three votes each.  Erin, who no one had approached for an alliance, could have been the tie-breaker.

Instead, the Survivors were asked to vote again, this time for either Lucifer or Rob.  And then the games truly began in earnest...

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: TRIBAL COUNCIL RESULTS
Date: 1/25/03 11:15:32 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: Baitshop3

Sigh. Now to embark on a witch-hunt....

Subj: Re: My vote
Date: 1/25/03 11:20:51 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: ejbeatnik@prodigy.net, Baitshop3

What have you done, you silly man? Did you vote for Rob? Or did Pete and Andrea lure you into a counter-alliance? You can't trust them! They're gonna feed you to the piranhas! Or pirahnas! Or however you spell it! Little tiny angry fish with big teeth!

Subj: Re: Stacking Up
Date: 1/25/03 1:20:02 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: maxedward@earthlink.net, Baitshop3

Cheeef - I guess you aren't getting these e-mails at home, so here's the situation. There was a tie vote - 3 votes for Pete, 3 votes for you, and 1 vote for Rob. So there's going to be a re-vote, but you and Pete can't vote this time. Obviously Pete and Andrea voted for you, and the third vote was probably Erin. Which would mean Eric voted for Rob - unless he voted for you and Erin voted for Rob. Maybe Pete and Andrea got to Eric. Anyway, I'm trying to ensure that Pete loses the re-vote.

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: TRIBAL COUNCIL RESULTS
Date: 1/25/03 4:00:07 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: straynge1@earthlink.net
To: ejbeatnik@prodigy.net, ubertrout@hotmail.com
CC: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

So Eric, have you heard from Scott, or are you dead to him?

This was a bit of a crapshoot; if we'd decided to go after Rob rather
than Jim, the mystery vote would have pushed it over the top. I think
this is a lesson: Think with your head rather than your heart while
playing this game.

It MUST have been Erin who voted for Rob, right? I figured she'd surely
go for Jim first! (Of course, you may know this for certain, Eric; I'm
not sure how much interaction you've had with The Others.) There's no
weird romantic fallout history between Erin and Rob, is there? It'd be
easier to figure out if it was Jen and Tim we were talking about.

I would be quite happy for the three of us to try and stick together
'til the end and clear out all the rest of the dead wood before trying
to figure out ways of screwing each other over. In any event, I've
gotta email Erin and see wassup with her, or I won't be around for any
more scheming 'til the Jury vote.

Couldn't blame 'em for mopping the floor with me, though -- crafty
fuckers have probably been strategizing since the game was announced.
I'd been rather laissez-faire, thinking everybody may just toss out a
vote the first couple times without dividing into formal blocs. A
foolish thing to think.

Subj: plea
Date: 1/25/03 8:52:41 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: straynge1@earthlink.net
To: mzamar@toast.net
CC: baitshop3@aol.com
File: buddy.jpg (56202 bytes) DL Time (32000 bps): < 1 minute
Sent from the Internet (Details)

What can I offer to woo your tiebreaker vote? I had barely paid
attention to this game, and now my head's on the block!

Umm... I've got an MP3 of The Cheeky Girls doing "Cheeky Song (Touch My Bum)"...I've got an autographed photo of bloated '80s porn star Ron Jeremy...

Remembering that we're marooned, I guess all I really have to offer
besides voting allegiance are some of the novelty pins from my Mork
suspenders: I could bear to part with "Blondie is a Group," and maybe
"DISCO DANCIN'!"

(Note that the pointy backs of the pins can be used for many purposes.
If your mink develops a blister or boil while marooned, you can use a
pin to lance it!)

c[y u]o8-4  <== Would you look at that -- speaking of cute rodents, my
adorable rat, Buddy, just bounded from my lap onto my keyboard to offer
you a personal greeting. It's like a wacky Family Channel movie around
here!

Here's Buddy devouring a persimmon she stole out of the shopping bag
while I wasn't looking. That Buddy!

Subj: INTERNET SURVIVOR: VOTING STRATEGERY
Date: 1/26/03 2:05:31 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: Baitshop3, ejbeatnik@prodigy.net, rmckim@ccsi.com

OK, gentlemen. Clearly if the three of us stick together we have the power to determine who goes between Pete and Jim. I still think we should keep Jim around and vote Pete off, because Jim is more of the loyal soldier type, while Pete is a crafty fellow. Besides, I'm sure Pete's primary allegiance is to Andrea. I dunno if anyone has approached Erin - she may have been the vote for Rob. Anyway, is there a counter-proposal on the table? If not, I think we should definitely whack Pete while we can, since we can get rid of Jim any old time.

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: TRIBAL COUNCIL RESULTS
Date: 1/26/03 9:56:41 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: Baitshop3

So I just talked to Eric and we figured you should be privy to a summary of the call. My objective was to get him to vote for Pete. I explained my theory that Jim would be good to keep around because he will probably always draw votes, thus keeping votes away from Eric and myself. Eric explained that Pete and Andrea had drawn him into an alliance against Jim. I told him that I didn't want there to be any chance of Andrea winning, and he agreed with that sentiment. We speculated what the game plan might be if we got rid of Jim now, but it seemed that would just be asking for another tie next time around, and one of us might be vulnerable. So, by the end of the call, I appeared to have won Eric over to the idea of voting for Pete. But is Eric just playing me? Only time will tell...

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: TRIBAL COUNCIL RESULTS
Date: 1/27/03 8:30:48 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: straynge1@earthlink.net
To: ejbeatnik@prodigy.net
CC: baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

On Sunday, January 26, 2003, at 11:13 PM, ejbeatnik wrote:

> Yeah, Scott is mad at me.  I have to iron it out.  I think it was Erin
> that cast the mystery vote.  There is no romantic history with them.
>
> Late-ah!
>
> Eric

Well, please don't iron it out by switching your vote tonight!

And please remember to vote before 7pm if you haven't already. I think
I'm gonna give you a call to make sure you're on top o' things.

Toodles,
Pee-tah

Subj: Disclosure
Date: 1/27/03 8:55:42 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: straynge1@earthlink.net
To: baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

Just called Eric on his cell phone to ensure that he'd placed a vote in
tonight's TC tiebreaker.

My exact words were something like "Remember, it's not for whom you
vote, but THAT you vote!"
 

********************************************************************************************
In the final analysis, Eric stayed true to Scott...at least for the revote...

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: My second vote-part two
Date: 1/27/03 1:57:14 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: ejbeatnik@prodigy.net
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

My second vote goes to Peter.  Eric votes for Peetah.   "sigh"

Subj: INTERNET SURVIVOR: RE-VOTE
Date: 1/26/03 11:03:19 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: Baitshop3

LUCIFER

"It's been fun. I'll miss your colorful suspenders. But I need the fake million dollars, so you gotta go."

*********************************************************************************

Lucifer’s Final Words:

Thank you. Thank you! I don't know what to say except 'You fear me. You really fear me.' The only solace I am able to summon at this dark hour is derived from picturing the heads of The Wicked Four being inserted violently and repeatedly into the black, pustule-ridden rectum of the [Christ Child, Buddah, Blessed Virgin -- insert your dearest-held religious figure here], then placed under a heat lamp, allowing the malodorous herpoid pus to harden into their hair (beards, lashes, nosehairs, all of 'em!). This makes me smile.

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: TRIBAL COUNCIL #2
Date: 1/30/03 3:52:58 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: lucifer@luciferlove.com
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

On Thu, 30 Jan 2003, Baitshop3@aol.com wrote:

ERIC (Valley Hell, CA).  Luxury item:  "Lube."

I'm thinking the lube may come in handy to help fit all them feet aimed squarely
at his ass. From the way Round 1 played out, he appears to be fucking up the
best laid plans of both sides. Unless he's pulling something very, very crafty.
 

*********************************************************************************************************

And so, despite votes for Jim from Andrea and last-minute alliance-mate Erin, Lucifer was voted off in the tie-breaker, while the “Wicked Four” set about choosing their next victim...

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR:  VOTING STRATEGERY
Date: 1/27/03 9:19:20 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: ejbeatnik@prodigy.net, Baitshop3, rmckim@ccsi.com

>Ok fellows.  I voted for Pete. We're in this together now.  If Peter goes, who is next?

I'd say either Erin or Andrea. I'm open to either, but Andrea might be the best move. Whaddaya think?

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR:  VOTING STRATEGERY
Date: 1/28/03 1:39:29 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: ejbeatnik@prodigy.net
To: ScottVonD@aol.com, Baitshop3@aol.com, rmckim@ccsi.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

I vote for Andrea next.

Subj: RE: Ahhh
Date: 1/28/03 2:33:15 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: James.Dryden@motortrend.com
To: James.Dryden@motortrend.com, ScottVonD@aol.com
CC: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

Yep. It is time to get rid of Andrea-she probably knows it, too.

*******************************************************************************
With Lucifer gone, Andrea moved to see where she stood with Erin...
 

Subj: please allow me to introduce myself...
Date: 1/28/03 8:43:12 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ubertrout@hotmail.com
To: mzamar@toast.net
CC: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

did you vote off pete or jim?

i know i don't know you, but you might as well tell me as it looks like i
will be next to go...please tell me?! do you like valium?

Subj: Re: please allow me to introduce myself...
Date: 1/29/03 3:40:13 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: mzamar@toast.net
To: ubertrout@hotmail.com
CC: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

Dearest Trout,

Valium is good yes.  I have some at home right now.  Not here on this island-internet of course.

Strictly minks here.

Minkly minkly mink.

Although you think you don't know me, apparently I am the only person to side with you when in the past you attacked some of Boz's Harvard friends on email as being a bunch of irritating snots.  You can ask him for details.  I can't quite remember it all, just liking your nasty notes to them.  Hurrah!

Subj: Re: please allow me to introduce myself...
Date: 1/29/03 5:38:31 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ubertrout@hotmail.com
To: mzamar@toast.net
CC: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

[Jim] is the weakest link...i know he is in an alliance with scott...that
accounts for two of the original votes against pete...do you get my
point...someone who i may or may not be in alliance with may or may not have
kept his word...i think they will pluck off us westcoasters one by one...you
may be a part of that alliance too. keep in mind that i will most likely be
on the jury...so butter me up with some honesty.

andrew's frenz are twats...that is what i called them...humorless twats!!
thank you for sticking up for me...i know that caused andrew alot of
grief...i've got a big mouth.

***********************************************************************************

With survival at stake, the tribe got baked for their next Immunity Challenge...

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR:  TRIBAL COUNCIL #2
Date: 1/30/03 6:06:19 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: straynge1@earthlink.net
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

The jury is attempting to send a message back to the tribe via ESP...
Please forward if silly extrasensory one-liners are allowed:

"Mister VonD, if you do eventually take a seat in the Jury Box, kindly
don't sit next to me following your first big meal o' beans 'n beer."

*************************************************************************************

Through a combination of speed and resourcefulness, Erin won the Beans Immunity Challenge and was immune from the Vote...

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: TRIBAL COUNCIL #2
Date: 1/30/03 2:23:10 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: mzamar@toast.net
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

A hard choice to make.  I say vote off Jim I guess.  That picture of him eating beans was really gross.
************************************************************************
...but the Girl Power alliance was no match for the Wicked Four...

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR:  TRIBAL COUNCIL #2
Date: 1/30/03 2:44:26 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: Baitshop3

ANDREA

"Andrea, I'm voting for you tonight because I get the feeling you're really not happy here. Whenever we gather around the campfire and Jim plays his bagpipes while we sing happy choruses of 'La Vida Loca,' you sit in a tree and throw coconuts at our heads. Plus, someone's been peeing in my beer and I suspect it's you. I feel you'll be happier hanging out at Loser Lodge with Pete anyway. So, good luck."

ANDREA’S FINAL WORDS:

Up Yours Scott!!

**************************************************************************
With the tribe shrinking, no one was safe...not even within the Wicked Four.

Subj: RE: INTERNET SURVIVOR:  TRIBAL COUNCIL RE SULTS #2
Date: 2/3/03 11:23:53 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: James.Dryden@motortrend.com
To: ScottVonD@aol.com
CC: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

Chief,
Who's next? Eric? Rob? Erin?
Chief

Subj: RE: INTERNET SURVIVOR:  TRIBAL COUNCIL RESULTS #2
Date: 2/3/03 11:29:58 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: James.Dryden@motortrend.com
CC: Baitshop3

I wuz assuming Erin. I'm open to suggestions. If we do go for Erin, we need a backup plan in case she wins immunity again.
 

Subj: RE: INTERNET SURVIVOR:  TRIBAL COUNCIL RE SULTS #2
Date: 2/3/03 11:32:55 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: James.Dryden@motortrend.com
To: James.Dryden@motortrend.com, ScottVonD@aol.com
CC: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

Okay, Erin, it is. What do you suggest for a backup plan?
 

Subj: RE: INTERNET SURVIVOR:  TRIBAL COUNCIL RESULTS #2
Date: 2/3/03 11:55:46 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: James.Dryden@motortrend.com
CC: Baitshop3

Hmmm...well, I'd probably lean towards Eric, since he might be too likeable to keep around. But on the other hand, he doesn't seem to try for the immunity challenges, which might be a reason to keep him around. I dunno. Let's see who wins immunity and then make a firm plan.

***************************************************************************
Clearly, the next Immunity Challenge was crucial for Erin...and, working with her sister Whitney, she was the only Survivor to respond by the deadline, seeming to guarantee her a spot in the Final Four.

But...in a cruel and controversial twist, she missed successful completion of the Immunity Quiz by the slimmest of margins, thus sealing her fate...
 

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR:  IMMUNITY CHALLENGE # 3 RESULTS
Date: 2/6/03 2:24:40 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: James.Dryden@motortrend.com
CC: Baitshop3

So...Erin it is, then?

Subj: RE: INTERNET SURVIVOR: IMMUNITY CHALLENGE # 3 RESULTS
Date: 2/6/03 2:28:05 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: James.Dryden@motortrend.com
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

My vote goes to Erin.

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR:  IMMUNITY CHALLENGE # 3 RESULTS
Date: 2/6/03 2:41:00 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: rmckim@ccsi.com
CC: Baitshop3

I guess Erin is the target this week. That's the way Jim's planning to vote, anyway, and I told him I'm in.
 

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: TRIBAL COUNCIL # 3
Date: 2/6/03 7:00:14 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: rmckim@ccsi.com
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

I've tried hard to get along with all off the players. I feel a bond with
them but I have to remind myself it's a game, a very serious game. With
that said.....
My vote goes to Erin. Sorry.
 

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: TRIBAL COUNCIL # 3
Date: 2/6/03 11:01:17 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ejbeatnik@prodigy.net
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

I vote for Erin.

Love always, Eric

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: TRIBAL COUNCIL # 3
Date: 2/6/03 11:08:15 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: Baitshop3

ERIN

"My vote is for you, Erin, because you're the last person left in the game I don't have an alliance with. I was worried for a second when I thought you had won immunity, because then I would have had to try and figure out some tricky maneuver I really don't have the energy for this week. But you played a good game, and I admired your creative solution to the beans challenge. Have fun on the jury and don't listen to anything that sore loser Andrea says."

ERIN’S FINAL WORDS:

Goodbye you bunch of fools.  I hope you all have fun not responding at all to any of the future challenges since I am the only friggin' one who even bothers to try at this point.  I spit beans at you I do.  Phah!

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR TRIBAL COUNCIL # 3 RESULTS
Date: 2/8/03 6:09:07 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: straynge1@earthlink.net
To: mzamar@toast.net
CC: baitshop3@aol.com, ubertrout@hotmail.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

Yo Erin,

Welcome to Losers' Lodge. And congratulations on surviving this long
without the aid of an Evil Voting Bloc. I thought you should have won
Immunity by default this time, but rules is rules, I guess.

I would have tried to include you in some kind of little alliance, but
I didn't even think to start scheming until the evening of the first
vote.

Maybe things will get less predictable now that only the "real" players
are left. Or not -- I get the feeling Eric will go next, as he probably
won't respond to the Immunity Challenge, and he was so wishy-washy with
the first week's vote. He's dead to me as far as this game is concerned.

I guess it could get interesting if Rob & Jim attempt to oust
ringleader Scott, but up to this point it seems they've been blindly
turning to him for instruction. He must have promised all three of them
they'd go with him to Final Two.
 

Subj: Re: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR TRIBAL COUNCIL # 3 RESULTS
Date: 2/10/03 11:19:32 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: mzamar@toast.net
To: straynge1@earthlink.net
CC: baitshop3@aol.com, ubertrout@hotmail.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

I just can't believe that the other people Scott has over a barrel didn't figure out yet that somehow they will all be screwed by him, the master puppeteer.  He has chosen well.

Eric is definitely next unless Jim's "work commitments" get in the way of him actually voting I think.  Oh I mean, RenFair commitments.

I don't think they have figured out they should oust Scott, I knew he was the power player, hence why I voted for him the last 2 rounds, hoping one of his cronies would break rank in a moment of realization but nooo.

At least we can now all enjoy the disco dance party that is the Jury.  Cheeky Girls ahoy!

******************************************************************

And so the Wicked Four became the Final Four, splitting the once strong alliance when Eric was handed Immunity by his fellow tribemates in the “Trust” Challenge.

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: IMMUNITY CHALLENGE # 4 RESULTS
Date: 2/10/03 8:23:14 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: Baitshop3, ejbeatnik@prodigy.net

Congratulations on your immunity, sir. I believe I am going to vote Rob out at Tribal Council. He's too crafty, and I think Jim will be easier to beat in the last immunity challenge (well, I'm just guessing at that, since I don't know what it's going to be). Anyway, that is my plan at this time.

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: IMMUNITY CHALLENGE # 4 RESULTS
Date: 2/10/03 8:25:46 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: Baitshop3, James.Dryden@motortrend.com

Chief - Well, Eric has immunity and I have a pact with you, so ipso facto, I'm gonna be voting for Rob at Tribal Council. I hope you will, too, because otherwise you'll be voting for me and that will make me cry and wet the bed.

Subj: INTERNET SURVIVOR
Date: 2/11/03 1:38:37 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: straynge1@earthlink.net
To: ubertrout@hotmail.com, mzamar@toast.net
CC: baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

I believe this is our first documented case of blatant duplicity, no?
Same vote, different reasons; on one hand it's loyalty, the other
strategy. To be fair, maybe Scott rethought his position during the
twenty-four seconds that elapsed between sending these two messages.

I still don't see any of these other boobs trying for a last-minute
save. Eric should be wielding his immunity like an Uzi at this crucial
point, and snuggling up with Rob, Jim or both. I think Rob should be
tipped off by Scott's conspicuous silence toward him.

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR
Date: 2/11/03 12:34:12 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: mzamar@toast.net
To: ubertrout@hotmail.com, straynge1@earthlink.net
CC: baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

I think I prefer the Jury.  I like getting to view all the scheming better than photoshopping myself eating beans.  OK, that's not entirely true but it is close.
 

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: TRIBAL COUNCIL # 4
Date: 2/10/03 10:16:36 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: Baitshop3

ROB

"Well, looks like the big screw may be in and I might be heading to the jury tonight. But I'm voting for Rob tonight because I promised to keep Jim until the end. I told Rob I wouldn't vote him out until after Eric, but since I can't vote for Eric, it's gotta be the Schmurm."

Subj: RE: INTERNET SURVIVOR: TRIBAL COUNCIL # 4
Date: 2/11/03 11:42:39 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: James.Dryden@motortrend.com
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

MIGHTY MIGHTY ROB!

******************************************************************
Surprisingly, at this crucial Tribal Council, neither Rob nor Eric managed to vote by the deadline.  Even more surprisingly, both of their randomly determined ballots wound up being cast for Scott...resulting in the game’s second tie...and swift recriminations from the suddenly endangered puppet master.

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR: TRIBAL COUNCIL # 4 RESULTS
Date: 2/11/03 10:03:08 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: Baitshop3, ejbeatnik@prodigy.net

Eric -

I know that you either voted against me or you didn't vote at all and your vote was randomly cast for me. If you didn't vote, I would ask that you do vote this time, and that you vote for Rob. If you did vote for me, however, I ask that you change your vote to Rob. I feel that it would be in your best interest, because you would have a better chance of beating me in the final jury vote. It seems clear that I've stirred up a great deal of animosity on the jury, whereas Rob has basically flown under the radar.

If you do vote against me and there is another tie, and I win the coin toss and remain in the game, hey, no hard feelings.

If, however, I lose the coin toss and get sent to the jury, I guarantee I will not vote for you to win the game no matter who you're up against at the end. Also, I will burn your house to the ground and smother your entire family to death in their own feces.

This e-mail will self-destruct in 10 seconds.

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR:  TRIBAL COUNCIL # 4 RESULTS
Date: 2/12/03 9:32:22 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: ejbeatnik@prodigy.net
CC: Baitshop3

In a message dated 2/12/2003 12:45:40 AM Eastern Standard Time, "ejbeatnik" <ejbeatnik@prodigy.net> writes:

>I forgot to vote.  It was random.  I vote for .........Rob

You are a man of honor, sir.

Subj: Re: INTERNET SURVIVOR:  TRIBAL COUNCIL # 4
Date: 2/12/03 10:23:15 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: Baitshop3, James.Dryden@motortrend.com

Chiefo - Eric reports that he forgot to vote, so his vote for me was cast randomly. He says he will vote for Rob in the re-vote, so as long as you also re-vote for Rob, it's all good. Then we'll just have to keep the immunity out of Eric's hands in the final round.

Subj: RE: INTERNET SURVIVOR: TRIBAL COUNCIL # 4 RESULTS
Date: 2/11/03 7:17:32 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: James.Dryden@motortrend.com
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

My vote goes to ROB!

ROB’S FINAL WORDS:

I brought this on myself by not getting my vote in on time. I hope I can
face my son again now that I lost out on the million fake dollars.
Good Luck to the finalists.

**********************************************************************************
Down to the Final Three, the remaining Survivors began the Jokes on a Hardbody Endurance Challenge...
 

Subj: Re: TRIBAL COUNCIL # 4 REVOTE RESULTS
Date: 2/13/03 9:53:01 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: Baitshop3

Seems there was this traveling salesman who got caught in storm one night near a farm. He stops and asks the farmer for shelter for the night. Well, the farmer says,  "You can spend the night in my barn, but do me a favor, don't  stick your willie into any of the three holes in the wall."

So the thunder and the lightnin' is a-crashin' and the salesman is a-tossin' and a-turnin', and he just can't get to sleep. He remembers about the three holes in the wall, but also about the farmer's warning. But the salesman can't help himself.

He sticks his willie in the first hole and it feels good.

He sticks his willie in the second hole and it feels even better.

He sticks his willie in  the third hole and it hurts like hell and it won't let go!

Well, in the morning the farmer comes out to find the exhausted and mortified salesman nursing his raw and mangled willie.  The farmer yells, "I told you not to go stickin' yer willie in them holes!"

The salesman whimpers, "What was behind them holes anyway?"

The farmer explains. "Behind the first hole was my wife."

"Behind the second hole was my daughter."

"And behind the third hole was a milking machine that won't let go until it gets 50 gallons! Hee hee hee hee hee!!!!"
 

Subj: Re: TRIBAL COUNCIL # 4 REVOTE RESULTS
Date: 2/13/03 12:05:54 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: ejbeatnik@prodigy.net
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

This guy walks in to a doctors office with a duck on his head.  The doctor says, "can I help you?" The duck replies, "yeah,get this guy off my ass."

Subj: RE: TRIBAL COUNCIL # 4 REVOTE RESULTS
Date: 2/13/03 11:27:34 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: James.Dryden@motortrend.com
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

So, uhm, there's these two dicks walking by a gay bar, and, uh, one of the
dicks says, "hey, ya wanna get shitfaced?"

Subj: Re: TRIBAL COUNCIL # 4 REVOTE RESULTS
Date: 2/13/03 11:39:16 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: Baitshop3
To: James.Dryden@motortrend.com
CC: Baitshop3

In a message dated 2/13/03 11:28:57 AM Eastern Standard Time, James.Dryden@motortrend.com writes:

Just to note: I will not be able to access a computer until next Wednesday.
I am leaving for Medieval madness tomorrow morning. So, if it is possible to
put things on hold until my return, that would be cool.

-- Uh-oh...as you know, Survivor is a harsh mistress!  And you ARE in the middle of the Final Three endurance Immunity Challenge, so...

...just hang in there as long as you can!  (For all you know, you may win by default!)

************************************************************************

Confident in the loyalty of his minions, puppet-master Scott dropped out of the endurance challenge early, allowing Eric and Jim to duke it out for Immunity.

But fate intervened, in the form of Medieval madness, allowing a newly competitive Eric to surge to victory...and betrayal.

Subj: Re: TRIBAL COUNCIL # 5 My vote...Boo Hooo!
Date: 2/19/03 2:34:35 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: ejbeatnik@prodigy.net
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

Oh Andrew, what to do.  If Scott stays, he wins.  But we've been in an alliance this whole game.  He was the one that wanted to keep Jim around.  I wanted him to go earlier. If I vote for Scott, then Jim will most likely lose to me.  A true survivor would get rid of the greatest threat.  That is Scott.

I vote for Scott.  That's my final decision......may God have mercy on my soul.  I'm voting off Scott.

Subj: Re: TRIBAL COUNCIL # 5
Date: 2/19/03 2:54:13 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: ejbeatnik@prodigy.net
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

guilt.

SCOTT’S FINAL WORDS:

"I will have my revenge, in this world or the next. I'll chase you round Good Hope, and round the Horn, and round the Norway Maelstrom, and round perdition's flames before I give you up!  From Hell's heart I stab at thee!  For hate's sake, I spit my last breath at thee! And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers!  And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee!"

*********************************************************************************************
And so, with the puppet-master hoisted on the petard of his own scheming, Jim and Eric faced the Jury in the Final Tribal Council...each hoping to become the Ultimate Survivor.

Subj: Survivor
Date: 2/28/03 12:32:11 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: ejbeatnik@prodigy.net
To: maxedward@earthlink.net, drydenj@emapUSA.com
CC:  Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

Dude,

I think you're going to win.  Unreal.  If you win, I'm glad that we pulled one over on the rest of the group.  I think my plan backfired on me.  But it was fun.  Your thoughts?

Congrats in advance.

Subj: Re: Survivor
Date: 2/28/03 7:35:13 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: maxedward@earthlink.net
To: ejbeatnik@prodigy.net, drydenj@emapUSA.com
CC:  Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

I dunno if I won or not, but I’m surprised that I got as far as I did. It was fun.

***********************************************************************
***************************************************************
And now...

It’s time to read the votes.

Remember, this time the Jury voted FOR one of the Final Two, meaning Eric and Jim both WANT to see their names on these ballots.

First vote...
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Subj: Re: FINAL TRIBAL COUNCIL - PART THREE
Date: 2/24/03 9:30:52 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: straynge1@earthlink.net
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

I am voting for ERIC to win Internet Survivor.  It was a dead heat right to the end for me. I don't feel either of the Final Two did much to actively advance his position in the game. And while Eric's unpredictability and non-reliability did inject an unexpected surprise or two into the proceedings, his wishy-washy game play also gave me false hope of surviving the first vote.

What finally decided it was this mental picture of Jim: He's sitting on a stump in a dreary, rainy woodland glen, sneezing and wiping his nose in between verses of dreadful folk songs to which he accompanies himself badly on a homemade lute. He is wearing a frilly peasant shirt, festive tights and pumpkin breeches. How could I vote for that...?
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Subj: Re: FINAL TRIBAL COUNCIL - PART THREE
Date: 2/22/03 8:53:48 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ubertrout@hotmail.com
To: straynge1@earthlink.net, mzamar@toast.net, rmckim@ccsi.com, ScottVonD@aol.com
CC: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)

my vote goes to jim.
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Subj: Re: FINAL TRIBAL COUNCIL - PART THREE
Date: 2/22/03 6:02:37 PM Eastern Standard Time
From: ScottVonD
To: Baitshop3
 

Approaches voting podium......
 

Uncaps pen........
 

Taps pen on podium......
 

Rubs forehead and grimaces....
 

Sighs dramatically....
 

Scribbles name on parchment....
 

"Jim, your answer to my question tonight deeply disturbed me.  It was not so much that you picked Carrot Top, but your claim that 'he'd probably be pretty fucking funny on a long car trip' shook me to the core. Nevertheless, I am a man of honor.  We had an alliance to the end, and I'm fulfilling my obligation."

Holds up vote: JIM
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Subj: VOTE
Date: 2/25/03 9:55:59 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: mzamar@toast.net
To: Baitshop3@aol.com
Sent from the Internet (Details)
 

I vote Jim off and Eric winner.  I am doing this because Eric used a strange stealth method of seeming totally uninterested in the game until the end when he suddenly kicked Scott out.
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That’s two votes Eric, two votes Jim.  And the final, tie-breaking vote...
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...was DETERMINED RANDOMLY, because Rob didn’t vote by the deadline, meaning THE WINNER IS...
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(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
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***********************************************************************
Cingular Wireless congratulates JAMES DRYDEN OF HOLLYWOOD, CALIFORNIA...

Congratulations, Jim, and welcome to the Internet Survivor post-show wrap-up!

As Probst, I couldn’t really share my thoughts until now, but let me say I was pleased and surprised by how closely this first edition of Internet Survivor followed some of the immutable laws of the actual show.

There was scheming and bitterness of course, but there were also the ironic twists and surprising turns that make the show great.  Jim’s ill-timed Medieval weekend...seemingly apathetic Eric suddenly becoming a force to be reckoned with at the end...puppet-master Scott’s fateful decision to throw the Final Immunity Challenge (which he could have easily won)...the crucial outcomes of Rob’s two random votes...Erin’s heart-breaking near miss on the Family Values Immunity Challenge...Andrea’s newfound Internet sisterhood with Ms. Amar...and, of course, the frantic scheming and counter-scheming surrounding Lucifer’s ouster.

I was amazed how closely this game just naturally followed typical Survivor story arcs.  As usual, there were people getting picked off one-by-one, but not rallying to vote off the obvious threat (Scott).  There were the under-the-radar minions who managed to stealth their way into the Final Two (Eric and Jim).  There was the shock ouster (Lucifer) and the suspenseful anything-goes ouster (Rob).  And, of course, there was the typical two week stretch featured in every Survivor season where you hope the underdogs will pull off some last minute coup, but instead they predictably get nailed like fish in a barrel (Erin and Andrea).

Anyway, let’s talk with the Plug Uglies, starting with our new Ultimate Survivor...

Jim...are you surprised to be sitting in the winner’s seat?  What do you plan to do with the fake million dollars (and your brand new fake Saturn Ion)?  What was your strategy?  Did you think Medieval madness would be your undoing?  What did you think of your chances way back at the beginning of the game?  Anything you’d like to say to your former tribe-mates?

Eric...you said your plan backfired on you.  What was your strategy?  Were you deliberately trying to mess up everyone’s plans?  Do you think you would have done better sticking with Andrea and Lucifer at the beginning?  Did you expect to make it to the Final Two?

Scott...do you think you deserve to be in the winner’s chair?  What was your strategy for throwing the Jokes challenge?  If you’d known Eric was going to be so competitive at the end, would you have tried to outlast him, knowing his demonstrated unpredictability?  Despite your eventual ouster, were you happy with your Alliance mates?  Do you wish you’d tapped Erin instead of Eric?

Rob...was your final, random vote on purpose?  Are you happy with the results?  As the first member of the Wicked Four to get the boot, do you regret picking Eric for Immunity in the Trust Challenge?  Were you surprised when your fellow alliance mates turned on you first?  What was your plan after Erin got the boot?

Erin...do you still think you should have won the Family Values Challenge?  Did you expect there to be so much scheming in the game?  As the only tribe member who never watched Survivor, you survived longer than Andrea and Lucifer...what was your strategy going in?  Do you want a rematch?

Andrea, Lucifer...you’re both so ruthless and competitive when you play the Survivor board game...how did Scott outflank you?  You could’ve ousted Jim in the first vote if you’d pulled Erin into an alliance right from the start...why didn’t you contact her sooner?  Obviously, if you’d managed to crack the Wicked Four alliance right off the bat, it would have been a very different game...what were your individual strategies?  Do you think you would have stayed loyal to each other, or would your alliance have cracked?  And I’ll repeat the question...are you ready for a rematch?

I hope so...because we here at Survivor Central are already scouting new websites and planning new challenges for...
 
 

************************************************************************