9:35 P.M.

"Muleskinner Blues" by Dolly Parton can be heard playing from the ballroom.

Bernadette deals you an eight of clubs, a four of diamonds and a two of clubs.

You're not sure, but you think you notice Bernadette dealing from the bottom of the deck as she gives Icy his cards and takes some for herself.

"Full house!" Bernadette says, showing her hand.

"Looks like I'm the winner," Icy says, throwing down four aces and staring at you. "And this hand was winner-fuck-all, so pull down your pants and let's get busy, white boy."

Staring at you lustily, Icy stands and pulls down his pants, revealing an enormous johnson.

Just then, a cop steps into the pool house. His eyes go wide in surprise as he catches sight of Icy's massive shlong, then he regains his composure and consults a notebook. "Brother Nitrous? Icy Hot? Bernadette Wellman? Sgt. Duffy has asked me to escort you three to the library. Would you all please come with me?"

If you thank God for a chance to get out of the pool house and follow the cop, click here.

Click here to run away from everybody, hide in the mansion, and take a nice, long nap.